dear husband [that i don't have yet],

i was thinking about you today.

i spent a few hours painting today - sitting on the floor, then on the couch - and my back was not very happy with that set-up. which made me think: husband, i certainly hope our home will have an art studio for me. 

so i kept thinking. of all the other wonderful things our home will have. white cabinets and lots of windows in the kitchen. a breakfast nook. a red front door. or maybe a black one. i'll let you choose. a neverland playroom with a giant treasure map painted on the wall... 

then i started to feel bad for you. and not just because of the handy-man role you'll have in our marriage. you see husband [that i don't have yet], i hate to admit this, but sometimes i can be needy. sometimes i get sad for no reason and i will need you to help me be happy. some days my hair will absolutely not do what i want it to, and i will need you to tell me i look pretty anyway. sometimes i may not feel like getting out of bed in the morning, and you might need to give me a little push - possibly a literal one. 

like i said. i am needy. you can't say i didn't warn you.

i will need you to say 'i love you' every day.

and i will need you to dance with me in the kitchen when i don't feel like starting on the dishes yet.

i will need you to tickle me when i'm mad at you for beating me in a game. [you beating me probably won't happen very often though, unless it's a stupid game that i probably didn't want to play in the first place, just saying].

and i might need you to carry me to bed when i fall asleep on the couch during a movie.

but before you go running off, i promise that being married to me will have it's fair share of benefits. 

i promise i'll kiss you a lot. [and i mean a lot]. and you'll probably like it. who am i kidding? i know you'll like it. we'll probably do lots of other things too, but i can't talk about that here because my mom will get mad at me. you know, like play board games and stuff.

speaking of board games, i'm a pretty awesome person to have on your team. 9 times out of 10, we'll win. pictionary, disney scene it, even other things like bowling or miniature golf, you name it... all of the other couples at game night will be pretty jealous of our awesomeness.

i make a pretty mean lasagna - even though i stole the recipe from my mom. i bet even if you don't like lasagna that much you will like mine. i actually can make lots of good dinners. and if you tell me you don't like casseroles with cooked broccoli in them, i promise i will use something different. and if there is a good football game on tv, i won't even mind if you want to watch it instead of helping [just don't get carried away]. i will make you whatever dessert you want for your birthday, and probably for lots of your unbirthdays as well.

i will say lots of stupid things and won't get mad when you laugh.

i will give you lots of pretty babies.

and i will always make you happy. i promise. even if it means rubbing your back when it feels like the longest 10 minutes of my life.

i like to think that it's a pretty good deal. in fact, i'm making lasagna tomorrow if you would like to come for dinner.

xoxo.

jana