i'm so happy i can't sleep.

really.

i tried to fall asleep for at least an hour, but my mind has been kind of a mess of thoughts lately. sometimes i don't even bother writing them down anywhere, because i have a feeling that later i won't want to remember all of these thoughts. but i will say that somewhere during that hour of restlessness i daydreamed about happy things and then cried because i was so happy. seriously. i cried.

to be honest, i've been able to go a long time without crying about things that are directly related to me. i'll cry during a movie, or when i read something sweet, but i can't even tell you the last time i cried for myself. at least before this week when i apparently decided to be a head case. oh well, tonight [uh, technically this morning] they were happy tears. and i will take those over upset or sad tears any day.

since i realized i was daydreaming and smiling too big to get any real sleep [i'll talk about why later, maybe], i decided i might as well be productive. so i got out of bed and spent the last few hours browsing some of my grandma's photos.

there actually weren't as many incriminating photos of me as i thought there would be. but of the few that i found, this is definitely my favorite.

yes. in case you were wondering, i have always been a major babe. so much in fact, that i can't even decide which part of my outfit is most attractive. i'm debating between the oversized swishy jacket and the pink shoelaces - i think they really tie the whole outfit together. [no pun intended. that was just an awesome coincidence i noticed later.]

thank you grandma beck, for making sure i never forget what a cool 5-year-old i was. [really, i'm pretty sure i was 5. i think kids were bigger back then].

ok. now i can sleep.